5 Things Not To Say to Someone with PCOS

These five comments drive me wild.

I am sure that they must bother other women with PCOS as well. So if you know someone with PCOS, please don’t bring up these topics. I know your intentions are pure (at least I hope), but they can really hurt us especially since we are trying genuinely hard to manage.

1.       I’ve never heard of it.

Well, that may be for a very good reason, PCOS is often misdiagnosed or undiagnosed. However, just because you haven’t heard of it doesn’t mean it isn’t a very real condition. PCOS affects me and the choices I make every day. If you want to know more, there are resources available, or ask me about it in a caring way.

2.       You don’t look sick.

I might not appear to look physically ill, but my insides probably would disagree. A woman who has PCOS has hormonal imbalances. Sorry, but you can’t see my hormones. Just because you can’t see it, doesn’t mean someone isn’t feeling the effects of a disease or condition.

3.       When are you going to start having kids?

First of all, this one drives me nuts on many levels. Just because I am a woman doesn’t mean that I want kids or have to have kids. Second, maybe I am struggling to have kids. Maybe, I am working with doctors and doing everything I can to have a healthy baby. This comment can bring up a lot of emotions and feelings for anyone let alone a woman with PCOS. It is best not to ask about kids unless someone volunteers the information.

4.       If you eat less and exercise more, you will lose weight.

Wrong! It is not the simple formula of calories in vs. calories out for women with PCOS. Any time someone sprouts this line to me, I want to slap them (I have heard this one way too many times even from medical professionals). A lot of us are insulin resistant and as a result, our bodies have trouble converting the food we eat into energy. Instead, it gets stored as fat. So it isn’t easy for us to lose weight. If it were that easy based on the “supposed/estimated amount of calories that I burn” I would have the physique of a model. Well, I’m not planning on walking down the runway anytime soon!

5.       Stop being so emotional.

There are times when I can be moody, anxious, happy, or sad all because of my hormonal imbalance. I have had moments where I have laughed and cried all in the same breath. Have some compassion and understanding. Do you think I like being all over the place?

I’m sure there are more insensitive comments out there, but these were the ones that struck a chord with me. Please remember this quote: 

“Be kind for everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about” ~ Unknown.

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